Why did I become a doula?
I first became a doula…by accident. I’ve always loved being around babies - I was the first in line, begging to hold my younger cousins. I gravitated to the new siblings of my friends - thrilled to do the smallest thing to help out. All through middle and high school, I babysat for my neighbors instead of the movie theater or restaurant jobs my friends had. In 2009, fresh out of college with no job prospects in my field of theatrical stage management, I told myself, “Just get a summer job. Make some money, save, and look for jobs in the fall.”. A friend of mine was doing this “newborn babysitting thing” and said she’d ask if I could pick up some clients too. My prayers and my friend brought me Robin, my amazing mentor and first teacher. She taught me everything she knew over the 8 years I worked with her. She also encouraged me to pursue a formal training, as well as looking for extra training in the areas like lactation and sleep support that interested me most.
As a new doula who didn’t have kids of my own yet, I wasn’t sure what I had that I could teach new parents. Surely there was some sort of magic manual for new parents that you got when you got pregnant, right? …Right?! What I saw over and over were parents coming home from the hospital, exhausted with a brand new baby, a folder of paperwork, and…not much else. Some were fortunate to have family nearby who would sometimes come over and cook a meal, throw on a load of laundry, or hold the baby. But what about when they need more?
Ta-da! I was bright eyed, eager to help, and brimming with new skills. At first, my focus was all about baby. Teaching parents everything from swaddling tricks to those first slippery baths, I was eager to teach anyone who would listen everything I knew. As I grew into my role and continued my education, I began to see how poorly supported the person who gave birth was. All of the focus is drawn to that itty-bitty cutie while the person who did all of the work is asked outrageous questions like “when do you think you’ll lose that baby weight” and “when are you going to start trying for the next one”. What?!
My understanding of how babies change families really began to click when I started on the journey to becoming a birth doula. Check out the rest of my doula journey in part 2 of 3 here!